Enjoying the Journey

Four years after deciding to become healthier, I know more than ever that good health  (fitness, wellness or whatever you call it) it isn’t a destination, but a journey. On that journey, there are detours, delays and derailments. Thankfully, there are also adventures, accomplishments and amusements.

When I first started, it was all about losing weight. To look better, of course, but also to feel better, live longer and be healthier overall. But still, it was all about the scale.

Looking back, it wasn’t until I hit my goal weight that the real journey started. I struck out on my own in that I was no longer enrolled in Doctors Wellness Center’s Healthy in Twelve program. I had the knowledge and tools, but not the weekly check-ins and accountability.

My weight went up a little,  and I was ashamed. I was still eating well and working out, but without the check-ins, I was eating more (yep, you can overeat even healthier foods and still gain weight) and not incorporating as many veggies. I was still healthier and many pounds lighter, but I was embarrassed that I hadn’t maintained that “goal weight.” My “skinny clothes” didn’t fit anymore. And I felt like people were saying “I told you so” behind my back.

I felt that way for a while, and to some extent, even today. I am 33 lbs. away from that magical number I call my goal weight. It’s not as low as I got two years ago, but it’s lower than what I am now. But I’m beginning to see that there is more to this than a goal weight.

Lately, I’ve been focusing more on fitness and strength. I’ve been working with a different trainer since July, and I talk to him about other success markers: increasing weights during strength training, longer stints on the treadmill and AMT, and more advanced exercises.

I’m also trying to focus more on clean eating vs. calories alone. I haven’t abandoned My Fitness Pal, but I’m trying to incorporate new recipes and more wholesome ingredients. And one of the biggest things I’m trying to do now? Give up artificial sweeteners.

Am I still trying to reach that “goal weight:” the weight that I feel the best, look the best and have some really cute clothes for? Yep. But it helps to re-frame things and look at them in a new perspective.


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